What lovely and useful things to share with those navigating these experiences. I wish I’d been able to read them years ago when I first started deconstructing. My deconstruction ended in me moving away from organized religion entirely, and I feel the freer for it, but I know that’s not everyone’s path. Thank you for holding this space in such a gentle way. I feel grateful that people like you are out there holding these aching hearts so tenderly.
Love and fear in the same place... your way of walking those in deconstruction through the process with love and understanding, and not fear, is beautiful. Your Venn diagram of identity, belonging, and safety is super helpful too! Thank you for showing up for those four people and for us as readers.
This makes so much sense. About God being live and at the same time punishing those that don’t conform. I still struggle with my belief in God, of what I want to hold onto and what is ok to let go of. When you let go of something you end up questioning yourself and your salvation. When I came out I didn’t fit into Christian circles and the lesbian circle rejected me because of my Christian viewpoint. The only thing I can trust is that God is love, pure simple unadulterated love, love with no judgement, love with no hate etc. how do you really deconstruct your religious beliefs, when you believed them 100%, it’s like loosing part of who you are, of loosing your security blanket and not knowing what you believe anymore.
Yes, you’re right - it IS like losing part of who you are. But on the other side of that liminal space, you are still you, whole and meaningful, whatever you choose to believe. Have you read Richard Rohr’s book, Falling Upward? I found it very helpful for moving through the deconstruction to the “second half of life spirituality”.
I attend a church that’s part of the post-evangelical collective. These elements of faith deconstruction...showing up, as you are, in safe spaces, are central to the message.
The challenge is building connections and culture when everyone’s lived experiences shape their perspective of what church is or should be, in a Christian context. How do we rebuild meaning, without the power dynamic at its core? It's a challenge.
I’m working on some research on the social construction of church communities in an era of faith deconstruction over the summer. I am eager to better understand the challenges.
Years ago I heard Phyllis Tickle give a talk in which she said that every five hundred years or so, the church has a giant “garage sale” where it thoroughly cleans house and rebuilds on new principles. Her theory was that we’re going through one now, trying to figure out how the church should now be shaped. It sounds like the kinds of questions you’re asking are related to that.
Yes, I’ve heard that 500-year perspective. And I believe there’s a lot of truth in that. There are a lot of people holding on to their old ways, though. Change is hard for many, and I believe even harder without deliberate and consistent introspective practices.
This is one of the best explanations I have read (or heard — because I listened to your recording) of the dynamic that happens when families and religion exile the one who “transgresses the truth” (as they see it), and how to begin healing toward a journey to possessing the real truth about who we are in these sacred bodies as beloved queer ones. Thank you for your work in the world!
What lovely and useful things to share with those navigating these experiences. I wish I’d been able to read them years ago when I first started deconstructing. My deconstruction ended in me moving away from organized religion entirely, and I feel the freer for it, but I know that’s not everyone’s path. Thank you for holding this space in such a gentle way. I feel grateful that people like you are out there holding these aching hearts so tenderly.
Love and fear in the same place... your way of walking those in deconstruction through the process with love and understanding, and not fear, is beautiful. Your Venn diagram of identity, belonging, and safety is super helpful too! Thank you for showing up for those four people and for us as readers.
Thank you! And... you're welcome. :)
This makes so much sense. About God being live and at the same time punishing those that don’t conform. I still struggle with my belief in God, of what I want to hold onto and what is ok to let go of. When you let go of something you end up questioning yourself and your salvation. When I came out I didn’t fit into Christian circles and the lesbian circle rejected me because of my Christian viewpoint. The only thing I can trust is that God is love, pure simple unadulterated love, love with no judgement, love with no hate etc. how do you really deconstruct your religious beliefs, when you believed them 100%, it’s like loosing part of who you are, of loosing your security blanket and not knowing what you believe anymore.
Yes, you’re right - it IS like losing part of who you are. But on the other side of that liminal space, you are still you, whole and meaningful, whatever you choose to believe. Have you read Richard Rohr’s book, Falling Upward? I found it very helpful for moving through the deconstruction to the “second half of life spirituality”.
I attend a church that’s part of the post-evangelical collective. These elements of faith deconstruction...showing up, as you are, in safe spaces, are central to the message.
The challenge is building connections and culture when everyone’s lived experiences shape their perspective of what church is or should be, in a Christian context. How do we rebuild meaning, without the power dynamic at its core? It's a challenge.
I’m working on some research on the social construction of church communities in an era of faith deconstruction over the summer. I am eager to better understand the challenges.
Years ago I heard Phyllis Tickle give a talk in which she said that every five hundred years or so, the church has a giant “garage sale” where it thoroughly cleans house and rebuilds on new principles. Her theory was that we’re going through one now, trying to figure out how the church should now be shaped. It sounds like the kinds of questions you’re asking are related to that.
Yes, I’ve heard that 500-year perspective. And I believe there’s a lot of truth in that. There are a lot of people holding on to their old ways, though. Change is hard for many, and I believe even harder without deliberate and consistent introspective practices.
This is one of the best explanations I have read (or heard — because I listened to your recording) of the dynamic that happens when families and religion exile the one who “transgresses the truth” (as they see it), and how to begin healing toward a journey to possessing the real truth about who we are in these sacred bodies as beloved queer ones. Thank you for your work in the world!
Thank you! "Transgresses the truth" is a great way to put it!